Obviously i am back from omaha at thisn point,but wishing i would have stayed a while longer and seen jamie a little more. the weekend was great, and the shower went well. Everyone seemed to have a nice time. I had a lot of fun seeing people, and am super stoked for the wedding...still unsure about the date situation, but have a about 2 weeks to decided what i want to do.
SO...apparently i am on extended vacation here. We are super slow in the NICU and have only about 15-17 babies right now....so who is the first one cancelled? ME! I am super bored and just want to work....is...get paid. What a great time of year to not be working! I can't ski the next few days, as they might call me at any minute and ask me to come it..a chance i will jump at at any moment.

I am in Omaha, Have been up since 3pm yesterday, it is now 8:30pm.....so 29 hours and counting. I did pull over and sleep in my Jeep for 2hours, and feel pretty good. the tummy is growlin. I think Andy is right, omaha is amazing, I heart it here, and he is not ever going to graduate if he continues to have this attn span and surf the net! GET OFF MY PAGE AND WORK ON THAT THESIS!!! Then you can peek!

so headed to omaha in the morning!!! Jamie's bridal shower and PARTY!!! I can hardly wait to get there and hang out with jamiers. I never get to see her and miss her like crazy, we are two wild ones when we get together and although we talk almost every day, we still have lots to catch up on!

So some boy drama...not to much here, keeping it all a little secret untill i know more is probably a better idea. Have not talked to a certain boy in over a week, and am stragely ok with it. His friends kinda threw him under the bus on Halloween and although I wasn't upset about it, I told him and I think that he is worried about it for some reason. OH WELL>>>>>I have way better/more exctiting/better behaved things on my plate!

Have been out with someone else a couple times in the last few weeks. Not really out out, just once on a quote "real" date, but I like just hanging out and chilling at home with this one. he is super duper sweet and is really really really a nice genuine guy. I think he gets me more than just about anyone I know, and that is so important right now. Things are going PERFECT and I just can't shake that good feeling about this right now.

so today is the day! HALLOWEEN and I have a rockin Pippi Longstocking costume, complete with the monkey! I skied this morning and it rocked, i was out there cruzin on some soft snow and basically skiing balls to the walls fast. It was great! My legs get a little tired after about 5 runs, so I took a break and then did five more....basically the locals call 10runs a full day. I skied in my underarmour and fleece jacket. It was so nice and sunny! Watched Brian EAT IT hard from about 8 feet in the air off the box in the park. went with him to the ski patrol station. he was banged up pretty goo!
so at the library now, just hanging out, then shower and get ready to take Brayden out tonight for trick-or-treating. We are headed to the rec center in idaho springs, even though matt strongly suggested we not show. Perhaps does not want to be seen in his costume. WHO CARES! we are SOOOOOO going! then to the fire station for some candy that the 19month old brayden cant eat!
maybe a big sit down convo tonight. A friend has tried to start a conversation with me 2 different times and I want to hear him out and see what he has to say. I really have no idea what he is up to, but of course I know exactly what I want to say....so sammers says let him talk first then me. Hopefully i can catch him tonight, this is starting to bug me, better just to talk it out! we will just see what happens, more to come about this laters! anyway, hope everyone has fun and safe night!

ROCKTOBER!!!! Amazing~ all I have to say about the post season show the Rockies have put on thus far. World Series is less than a week away, and I ( along with every other person in the world) am praying to get tickets.
The Jeep still ROCKS! I heart my new car and have been getting really great gas mileage so far. Lets just keep those fingers crossed. I have so far had a rough week....started out great with an impromptu get together with a friend for some frisbee golf, which i am ok at....and then out with another friend to watch the game. T AAARRGGGG!

The downfall of the week came Tuesday with my first day shift in forever...thats what you get for being the new girl...and the very traumatic and tragic death of a very very very sweet little baby that had stolen my heart. It has been a hard few days just remembering that I do work in an ICU, which is sometimes hard to remember. It was a rough day Tues, but I am doing ok.....many tears later. Good friends Tuesday night made the evening look a little better. It is just so sad, but such is life.

on a slightly lighter note i have decided against cable and have joined the gym instead. Figured that paying for cable is not what i want to do right now and being active is better for the mind and body. No big weekend plans yet....let me rephrase....no plans for saturday and a date on sunday...what we are going to go i have no idea....lets hope it is nice outside. Maybe skiing on monday, it sounds like the snow is amazing and I think that I am ready ... Plus my legs are a little more ready for the day. More laters

Dear Binder family....send me a photo that I can put in a frame....of all your georgeous faces!
On a side note.....I bought a car today! YIKES! It is amazing....a brand new 2007 jeep liberty. It rocks! And i traded my focus (tear) and the xterra (wahooo) so i only have one vehicle! This is great! more about this later....they are detailing it right now and i pick it up in one hour!

More random thoughts....

I believe in the garter toss but not the bouquet throw ~ketsup goes with almost any meat~ I duck anytime something hit my windshield~ I look in every car that I pass~ I will never date a fireman again~ I am not afraid of spiders, but am terrified of crickets and grasshoppers~ I hate almost all snowboarders~ I have very few regrets in life, only 2 really and both have to do with boys~ I think that if you are a best friend of a boy, you get to go to the bachelor party~ My cough doesn't bother me, only other people~ I do not really like chocolate chips in cookies~ I have never eaten an anchovie~ Grilled pineapple is the yummiest thing on this planet!~ I do not wear socks in bed, even if my feet are freezing~ I sleep on my stomach, but can't lay on my tummy on the floor without getting a stomach ache~ I say potty and don't think there is anything wrong with that~ I love it when a boy kisses you and puts his hand behind you ear and on your cheek~ I have more zits now that i am in my 20's than i ever did in highschool~ I only talk to two people that I went to highschool with~ I have more friends that i see less than 3 times a year, than i hang out with locally~ wes and his poetry karate are the funniest thing i have ever seen~ I respect him for having such confidence and wish i had that much~people inately trust me with secrets...even though i cannot keep one and tell people that very openly~

So apparently the Random thoughts of my genius mind were a hit....lots of feedback from a lot of you! I don't think that I have a lot to add right now. I am setting my schedule for work for the next 3 months, from next week till Jan 1st. YIKES! That is only one of a few things that I don't love about my job, but people here seem to be very willing to trade days if anything ever came up. The new thing is that I will only be working 5 night shifts in all that time...the rest are days..... Not my fav again, but way more conducive to having a social life.

I am starting to plan my next 2 trips to omaha, for Jamies bridal shower and her wedding. I am already stressed about the actual wedding! I love my dress and it looks nice on me ( that is me being very modest! :).....but how do you take a date to a wedding that far away. Mind you I have no one to ask at the present moment, but that is a while away, and by then I might, but what a Pain in the butt! Any suggestions anyone??????

So next week i might just take off on a little road trip.....many of you might guess that i have a very important person to meet in South dakota......(Andy and Tawnya and Madelyn I promise to call before I hit the state line if i am coming!) NOt sure yet....Sam has planned a birthday party for herself next week on the 11th and I am not sure I can make it....i think it might be really akward.! More about that laters! No big plans for the weekend yet.....I am only off Tonight (thurs) and Friday.....I kinda tried to make plans for Friday night, but we will see how that works out...

9 days till LOVELAND opens and I have some serious leg work to do before then if I plan on starting the season off on my Sprayers! New ski boots are in my near future....

so the saga of melissa continues....I am living in colorado right now...i will be here for awhile now... but having more fun than ever. Going out with friends, dating perhaps? ;) I am really really happy with my life right now and how things are going...

Random thoughts
I love to be outside, especially when in rains~ i do not mind that it snows in june~i love waking up and love falling asleep~cows scare me~i lock my car doors when there are pedestrians, even if they are 8years old~ sweatshirts without hoods are dumb~road trips by myself are my favorite~i can't sing at all, but do it all the time~ I think asking someone if you can kiss them is dumb ~i talk to myself in the shower when no-one can hear me~ i despise my wedding dress~i love delivering babies, but wish they came from somewhere else~ i am a little squeemish, which is new~i love the way babies smell after the first bath~my legs get itchy at 4am~i can't txt with the auto spell thing~i watch scary tv shows about real life scary people, but am to afraid to watch fake scary movies~i like to cry~i talk even More when i get nervous~i like to ride bitch in the car, so i get to be in the middle of everything~i am addicted to chapstick and gatorade~i like pink, and do not wear yellow~i want to own a subaru~i hate yellow cars, and have never ridden in one~i can't build a tolerance to alcohol,no matter how hard i try.....and trying to build one has become a goal ( a girl has to have dreams)~I don't think i could ever get a tatoo~I am an expert on pizza!~I will not eat anything with peas in it~i am terrified to cut my hair~ i love to snuggle, but don't like to hold hands in public~ I am noctural~I love my friends from NY and wish i could see them more~skiing terrifies me, but i love it~ I can't to layups, but can beat a whole cabin of 13year old boys in knockout time and time again~ I love the bear costume~I despise CM and BW~i hate the way new jeans smell~I wish i could wear my sandals everyday of the year, and will continue to do so untill there are at least 3inches of snow~i do not believe in black socks~i hate the ice mashine in the freezer~ scraping ice off the car window makes me puke~i like babies that are less than 5lbs, and am not really interesed in bigger ones~ NOT all babies are cute, contrary to what most people think~ i love the public library and think it is much more valuable than having the internet at home

I don't think i have a said hero right now...I think that the person i am the most proud of at the present time is me. I have made a lot of BIG life decisions the past couple months and am very very happy with who i am right now and what i am doing. I am being my assertive self and have found again that this role works for me and that I am more independant than i thought i could be.

So this is a long time coming......
A little update. I am back in Colorado, have a new place and start a new job tomarrow! My job rocks and I can hardly wait to get started....minus the corporate orientation crap that goes along with nursing. My nex condo is really cute and super nice...and has 2bedrooms and lots of extra space....hint hint to anyone wanting to come visit! Ski season is just around the corner!

So last weekend was the "big" weekend. some friends and I took a mini vacation and headed off to south padre island for a few days. We got some sun and swam in the ocean and just chilled. I did really well and it turned into more of a celebration for dodging a major bullet than a pity party. I am doing great! Andy and Tawnya had their beautiful little girl and hopefully i can get a few days off to go bug them! that is about all for not.....i promise to be better at keeping this updated!

Double Daylight savings starts tonight! Wahoo! Ok...... a little more info here might be good. at camp 5th session we do double daylight savings. This is a schedule change for all the councelors and kids so that it is not dark in the middle of the evening program. So polar bear swim tom is at 7:30 camp time......6:30 real time!!! YIKES!!! it is a little confusing, but cool, cuz i am done at 830 real time and can still run errands or go get real food for a late dinner! Wahoo! anyway, it is after "11" here, so i am off for some much needed beauty sleep!

so apparently i am not so great at keeping this up to date. I am back at camp, at the planning metting for 5th and the last session of the summer. I leave camp in 8 days. I am more than ready and can hardly think about it at the same time. Camp is so much a part of my life. It has been such a great place for me to "recover" this summer. On one hand i am ready to leave and get out there, new job, new house, new boys? : ) Yet, it is such a secure place and we all know that i love the fact that i love a routine and no spontaneous moves! My trip to mexico is planned thanks to sam, who will most likely be my roomie when i get back to denver. we/i want o live in golden, which is a great little place and pretty central to the things i need to do. well..... that is about it for now. I will try to be better about this over the next few weeks. ANDY and TAWNYA are about to be parents. so that is HUGE! any day now i suspect....so a trip or 10 to SD is in order! and the job interview in Denver will happen when i get back! cross your fingers!

today we are all back at camp for planning, which is a great big meeting that gets us ready for tom. when the kids arrive. Nothing to exciting today. Went to the mall and ran some errands, lunch with a friend, then back to camp for this meeting. All the Pool Fools are old staff, so we know what needs done and we are finished about 3 hours early! Liz w. loaned me Harry Potter 7, so I suppose i will start reading that tonight! I did go to the library today to get some books, so i am set up pretty good for the next 2 weeks.
I talked to my travel agency today. They are looking for jobs for me in Buffalo and Denver. I am aslo applying for jobs in the denver area. I really like it there, but am still up in the air about the whole thing. Saw something today about E.F. today on the computer, and just had to laugh, both at him and me. He is so pathetic! and i am so lucky! a little shout out to TIM (from omaha/den). talked to him today, and he has promised to send me some mail! for the rest of you who love the post office, feel free to send me letters anytime!

c/o Cradle Beach Camp~ staff
8038 old lakeshore
angola, ny 14006

oh and check out the new cradle beach website! it is amazing
cradlebeach.org

so far changeover has been great. I have slept a ton and am feeling much much much better. Last night 6 of us went to dinner and then to Harry Potter 5. It was fun to get out of camp and get into some airconditioning. We got back to camp late, and had a campfire. We have fires a lot, which is always a lot of fun.
Today has been much less low key. I slept in and then went to the car wash and vaccummed my car. It was super messy, and needed a good cleanup. Then just back to camp and laid out in my new bathing suit and tried to catch a few rays on my stark white tummy! not much success there, but more work tomarrow. Tonight i am going to go get my friend Keith ( he needs a ride back to camp) and we are going to go to Shakespeare in the Park to see Athello. It will be a good time. We do not have to work until 4pm Monday, so all day tomarrow is still time for me to chill. Wahoo!!!
A big THANKS to all of you who have sent me your numbers. I appreciate it! well....shower time! Oh....I got to move back to the Kelley house, which is where i lived 2nd session.I am back in the pool as a lifeguard this next session. Yippe! And i am helping the nurses to med intake on Tuesday, which will not be so easy, but will be a change of pace for a few hours.!

not a lot to say tonight. I am on duty in Tuskie, only my second night on so not too bad. Last night was our sleep out and we camped on the back porch....well....until 4am that is. Then is started to rain. The three councelors that were on, well...we had those boys up and back to the cabin and back asleep in less than 15 min. then it was sunshine day today...a big crazy day every session at camp and games in the field tonight. Needless to say, both the kiddos and the councelors are Exhausted! We played dodgeball, SPUD, and potato stamp tag, and an about 10miles doing all of this. Yikes. I am more than ready to get these boys home! I need some sleep!
My phone is working! i am not sure i love the new phone, but will adjust i suppose. So feel free to call or text me to let me know your number, as i lost all my numbers in the 'accident'. I am also not setting up my voice mail message untill i no longer sound like a man.!!! my voice is long gone and i have a raspy thing going on!! kinda sexy! ok...not really, but since i am stuck with this for awhile, ya gotta tell yourself something! anyway, boys go home FRIDAY!!! then i am off till Tues! Wahoo!

hey everyone! So I totally lost my phone last night in a tragic flushing accident. Long story, but it is now resting in peace with the fishes. I did get a new phone today, but it will not be activated until tomarrow! YIKES! it totally stresses me out and i am going a little nuts not being able to talk to anyone. I did NOT change my number however, so feel free to call anytime and i will re-add you to my phone book. i ran to the store today and bought a jacket, it is not warm here and I am freezing!{ sus---if you read this feel free to send me the pink stocking hat that is in the green tub in the pool table room ( the tub with all the stickers)}
So, Tuskie cabin! Another YIKES here. today was my day off, and Christmas at camp. I hung out here most of the day to just chill and see the kids respond to christmas, the decorations, Santa and the gifts. My 13 boys are very cute, sometimes very naughty, but for the most part, pretty well behaved. THere are always a few that drive ya absolutly insane, but i am doing ok with them. I was so nervous, as I have never been in "boys field"---the normal crazy boys. They are funny because at 10-12 years they all want to be really tough, but then always say yes to a goodnight hug when i tuck them in. just 5 more days and they go home, and 5 days is not that long!
so also looking for jobs. I head home in less than a month and need to problably be employeed by then. I am pretty sure right now taht i am headed back to colorado. I think i love it there a little too much to leave. Emily is close by, and she will be a year old, and i have friends there....so for now i am serching in CO! Time will tell. Things seem to be falling into place and working out just enough to make my life just about perfect! Other than the phone catrastrophy* i am great!
PLEASE CALL SOMETIME THIS WEEK SO I KNOW YOUR NUMBERS! love melissa

ok...so a very big week to catch everyone up on. 2nd session at camp is over and 3rd session starts tomarrow. I will be in a cabin this session, Tuskie, working with 14 ten-twelve year olds. They look naughty on paper, so we will see how the next ten days go. We have a holiday every session at camp, and this session is Christmas and it is the most fun! I love it and the kids love it so it is a great time. I am nervous about working in "boys field", which are the normal boys. They can be really difficult, but the supervisor of the boys wanted me in one of his cabins, and everyone here seems to have faith in me!
Sooooo..... I am living with five roomates. Found them last night scurring around my electric fuse box in my room. MICE! YIKES!!! they are cute and i think we scared them off and took their home away, but time will tell. If I see one again, I will have to find somewhere else to live this session!

ON to my weekend. SOOO the guy i went out with a few times in CO was in town, here in NY, this weekend for a wedding. So once he was done with his friends wedding things, he came to camp for a 1.5days and hung out with me. I had a great time!!!!! we just hung out the first night, went to dinner, got a drink and watched the sun set on Lake Erie. Then yesterday, we went to the Falls and just hung out. It was a really great time. He knows i like him and am crushin ....it works and we seem to have a good time together....who knows what that means right now, but i am having fun an think he is really great

so a little laundry to finish and then to bed! more later!

so very exciting news. I have the most terrible and itchy heat rash that anyone in the history of EVER has ever had!!!! I think that i might possibly die. Ok....maybe not tonight, but if it gets any worse i will for sure scratch my self to death.
On to more exciting things. I am having a wonderful time at camp...like always. I have also completly lost my voice (like always) too. Tomarrow is my half day off.....my day off is split this time due to potential plans this weekend. I am just gonna chill and try to get some rest. that is about all for now...more later!

so the 4th was pretty regular. Party at beths house, spent the night...sat in her great hot tub, but went to bed about 2 and headed back to camp around 10am. We were near a town called brockport and this friend is coming to NY next week for a wedding but staying an extra day and will be hanging out with me and I am a little worried that he is headed to brockport and not brocton, as port is about 2hours, and the other is 20min. So back at camp and got my bike ready to ride! Also found out about 5 of my top 10 favorite campers are coming out this session and I get to feed a kid Brian. Mainly i get to sit next to him while he scarfs his food and then chase him around the dining hall and the camp grounds the rest of meal time. ! it is a good workout and i adore him!! THIs should also make for some very interesting and funny stories>

Happy 4th all! I hope everyone is having a great day! I heard it is really nice in colorado, so hope the picnics are extra yummy! I am getting ready to head to Rochester, we are skipping the Falls since we are apparently having a monsoon today! It is rainy and dreary, but i love days like this out here!

So tons of new things. I am at CAMP!!! I heart camp! This place makes me happier than I have ever been and it is a place like this that everyone needs in their lives. I arrived yesterday at 11pm, after a long drive...more about that in a minute, and when i got here some people ran to greet me and everyone was super excited that i was here. I did not realize how much these crazy fools love me.....the feelings are mutual. Even BW....my old arch nemesis...was really nice. So I will be in the pool this session and am living in the Kelley house, not a cabin. This is where I like to be the most, we get to know all the kids at camp and get to spoil them without having to dicipline them. It is great. So everyone is gone right now....the kids went home today and new ones arrive on Friday. I am going to Niagra Falls tomarrow with friends and will be having a sleep over at a friends house. It is all like being 10years old....which was a while ago and very fun!
So the drive was better than i anticipated. I left omaha at 6:30am and drove 16 hours to get here. I actually enjoyed the drive and saw many states. I discovered somethings about myself. I am totally annoyed by fools who do not use their cruise control and pass you and then you pass them.....AAAHHHHHH!!!! SHaking my fist!!! Then I noticied that i must eat sunflowers one at a time or your mouth gets really really sore in those 16hours. I think i like cleveland, oh and will try to spend a day there on the way back to NE....

About that.....no real ideas yet but this kinda goes back to the fate thing. So the whole fate thing is that when I decided that i was coming to camp, I called and totally caught the camp director in her office on a sat during her only 10minutes that she was there that day....then I randomly stopped to talk to someone about a lifeguarding class and this guy was there and got that scheduled.....and he is not usually working on saturadys. .....ps...the guy who i went out with....

.and just meeting some nice people and it has really made me realize that I am GREAT! and totally dodged a HUGE bullet this fall. I had some touble seeing that but am now breathing a big sigh of relief.

So after camp i was going to do some travel nursing....but am not so sure. this hospital in denver that i really really like suddenly has some openings (fate?) that have not been there for months. ANy of the 3 jobs i could get there would allow me to also do all the the skills i have(post partum, Labor and delivery and Level III NICU) and i would be furthering my education adn knowledge. I like the idea of that. Traveling would be great, but i do have friends in denver and feel good there and am not sure that uprooting myself yet again is the best thing? Who knows right now. I also would be close to home and have realized how amazing my crazy family is! And i would have a roomie with my friend Samantha! Shout out to sam and Jamie for their amazing ability to make me laugh and to be amazing all the time. ANyway,,.....i am going to head outside and watch the great sunset on lake erie! my heart is Very very happy!
talk to ya later!

so the big move-a-ruski went great.....my body hurts all over but i am doing ok......i have no idea where i am going....but i am half-way there..I THINK? EF did not know I left untill yesterday.....I do not care what he thinks about it, just that i did it without him knowing,...Wahoo for me! I arrive in NY on tues and am superduper excited...this summer is going to be GReat!!! anyway....more RE-packing to do and OUCH!

So ...tonight is the big night! I am outa here and totally ready to go. Will be headed east on Sun to see JAMIE!!! Wahooo...did i mention that i am the maid of honor in her wedding! Yippee! just getting things finalized and trying to not kill myself bringing things out and down.....anyway....more laters. peace out!

So earlier this week I said that in general things don't always go the way you plan...but apparently this is my week to shine. I have already had a great week and getting better. I am super excited about the next few days, a little sad, but ready. (Still being evasive here, i know, but so do the rest of you...i think) Someone told me last night that they were content.....and I think that might just be the most very perfect word for me right now....who could imagine that that would come out of my mouth...but everything happens for a reason...and I think that the way everthing has fallen together...fate is playing a major role in my life at the moment. I am not usually a big believer in fate....but it has practically smacked me in the face the last two weeks. I am wearing a huge smile and it is real! Imagine that!
I said yesterday that my date on monday went well.....I suppose it did as we went out last night and had an even better time. He is a really nice guy....who knew they are out there......this just reinforces that these creatures you all talk about do still exist! I know this is all just for fun....which is just what i need right now! What a great time!

So Tuesday...just lots of errands to run today....getting my nose repierced this afternoon.....decided that I want to do that again and I loved how cute it was the first time. Went out last night....on a date.....I thought it went really well! really needed that boost, but it was a lot of fun and might go out again later this week! Wahoo! other than that, just hangin out around town and chillin with samantha and brayden, trying to soak him up as much as posible in the next few days!

so i slept really well today and am getting excited about the upcoming week. a little sad about some transitions, but doing really well.

Hey everyone! So my page looks a little different...more like a clean slate. I have decided to erase everything and start over here. This goes for just about everything in my life...I am gearing up for some MAJOR changes and think that starting over here was a good way to kick off the week.....

so the saga continues, but much less dramatic as of the last few days. I am done with EF. he emailed me last week and was just outright mean! Who is he that he thinks he can talk to me like that!!! So as he suggested..... I am DONE DONE DONE!! I know ya'll might be thinking it is about damn time...you are right...it just took one of us a little too long to see it. But i feel really empowered about the whole thing and realized how strong i am! BUT (isn't there always one with him!) he went to a resturant in town the other night and was was talking to a friend of mine and totally admitted that he was the bad guy and wished that he could just talk to me! HA HA HA!! Blew it big time chump!

Ok....other big news. so this guy that I randomly met two-ish weeks ago totally asked me out!! i met him and thought he was smokin' hot, but like that ever works out.... But as i was getting ready to leave this thing the other day he kinda asked me out in a round-about way....but called tonight to really ask me out! Sweet!

As for the rest of what is going on....i am not posting it here for a while....EF does not need to know anything about what is happening in my life! ...only a few of you know what i am up to....but feel free to email me and i will let ya know where my next few months/years will be taking me! big GOOD changes in store. and for all of you who have been reading all along, just know that i am really happy love melissa